Sunday, March 8, 2015

pockets of progress

We had a family party yesterday.  our family is pretty big, with all the extended cousins, but lately, has seemed small because we do not always share with each other.  My cousin is now out of prison and I have been thinking of her a lot and seeing her as much as I can.  I am so proud of her for being honest and brave and I was in awe of her yesterday at the party, telling people where she was and why, when for years, we all pretended we didn't know there was a drug problem.  She inspired me.  My boys were very good too.  That's the progress.

It's small things, like Landon put his gloves on with no issues, he did not go to the door at all yesterday at the party wanting to go.  He tried to play with the other kids when he could, such as sliding down the stairs.  He was overall in a good mood and was friendly to everyone he knew.  Those are the moments of progress I have to hold onto.  Logan was good too. He was playing with the  little ones his age and was happy overall.  It was a great party.  I have been dreading them lately because it's been so fake, but thankfully, my strong cousin can change this for all of us, who hide our struggles because of shame and fear.

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